Leaps of Faith

I had a realization today. It came to me somewhere between Ella and Tootsie's stalls. Of course, some of my greatest thinking moments have occurred while I was holding a manure fork. I determined that my life can be summed up as nothing more than a string of decisions. Like strands of DNA which connect to form the cell of my life, my decisions have also connected to create the who, the now, the where, and the why that are me.

Sometimes, these strands are repeated. We make one good decision and are likely to repeat that decision in our favor over the course of our lives. Other times, we mutate and make decisions that seem out of character. These are the decisions which can oft times define our evolution to a new self. Of course, mutant decisions can have life-altering affects as well. Sometimes, we spend years overcoming the results of these decisions.

Regardless, my life is a culmination of the decisions I have made. Never one to be a passenger, I have steered my own course- with whatever guidance seemed appropriate at the time. As I get older, I find that I am beginning to make choices more cautiously. Where I once held my breath and jumped into the deep end with no fear, I now find that leaps of faith are becoming harder to make.

I'm not exactly sure why this is so- my life is full and I am happy. Obviously, I've made some good decisions along the way. Yet, for whatever reason, I find myself on the cliff of a choice and I've been teetering on the precipice. I've held my breath, waited for someone to push me/or pull me back, and prayed that a sign would come. Silly me. It's been there all the time- I just need to take a leap of faith.